silent sunday

On Children

Your children are not your children.

They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.

You may give them your love but not your thoughts,
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow,
which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.
You may strive to be like them,
but seek not to make them like you.
For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.

You are the bows from which your children
as living arrows are sent forth.
The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite,
and He bends you with His might
that His arrows may go swift and far.
Let your bending in the archer's hand be for gladness;
For even as He loves the arrow that flies,
so He loves also the bow that is stable.

~Kahlil Gibran, The Prophet

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Since starting back at work and having Nate in nursery most of the week, my mind keeps flitting back to this poem. I first read it many years ago and thought it was beautiful, but now that I have a child it really strikes a chord with me. 

The phrase "they belong not to you" especially resonates with me. I feel a primal attachment to Nate, which was forged during my pregnancy and during his first few months, which were difficult for me. The struggles we went through together makes him feel like a part of me; mine.

But I know deep down that he is not mine - that I am simply one of his protectors, creating a safe environment for him to grow and discover himself. 

This poem captures that bittersweet feeling of parenthood to me and the idea that our children are not ours to control, only to guide in a certain direction and let go, like arrows shot from a bow. 

first week at nursery

This week was a big transition week for us. It was my last week on maternity leave before officially returning to work and it was also Nate's first week at nursery. He was there for 3 full days. 

Although I am technically still on maternity leave until next week, I have been working 2 days a week for a while, so Nate has slowly gotten used to being away from me for the day. Despite this, I was still nervous about him starting nursery because until this week, he had only been with his dad or his grandparents so the move to a group setting was a big change!

The whole morning of his first day, I was worried sick about him. I had trouble concentrating at work wondering if he was eating well, napping, and adjusting to his new environment. I was especially nervous about his naps. Nate gets so upset and cranky when he gets tired and he generally only naps in the car, in the stroller or on me after nursing. I just couldn't for the life of me see how he would nap in a bustling room filled with children. I held off as long as I possibly could and then called to check on him on my lunch break. 

I could not believe it when they told me he had slept for 45 minutes earlier that morning and was currently enjoying his lunch of cottage pie and swede!  I was so relieved. From that moment, I knew everything was going to be fine. I am so proud at how well my little man has adapted to his new environment. And after all my worry about Nate's naps, can you believe that this is how my husband found him when he went to pick him up at 4pm? 

Nate's first day went as smoothly as I could have hoped. And the next 2 days went fairly smoothly too despite a new tooth coming though and multiple doses of pain reliever being administered. 

There have been a few negative consequences of starting nursery  Nate has had a runny nose and cough ever since his first day, and it doesn't seem to be clearing. He is also very tired in the evenings so we have had to put him to bed earlier than normal. 

On the positive side, he has been sleeping well at night and I have noticed Nate's gross motor skills have improved. At the start of the week he was pulling himself up to standing slowly, Now he pulls himself up super quick and does squats, lunges, and all sorts of funny contortions. It's amazing to watch him pick up these skills so quickly!

And to top off this week of firsts, Nate made his very first school art project, which I was given to take home. It is now being displayed in prime position on our dining room table and will no doubt end up on the fridge for months and then stored away for posterity's sake. 

Driving on the Continent Giveaway {Win £25 to spend in Sainsbury's!}

Hello readers! Have I mentioned yet that I am part of the Sainsbury's Bank Family Blogger Network? I don't think I have. Well, it's a fantastic little group of family bloggers who share information, write guest posts for the Money Matters website, and from time to time get to host giveaways.

I am super excited to announce that I have been chosen to host their most recent giveaway about favourite driving holiday destinations. How appropriate seeing as I have just gotten back from a 2 week driving holiday to France and Spain?

Sainsbury's Bank have put together a really useful infographic called Driving on the Continent which shows all the exciting destinations in Europe that can be reached by car from the UK all within a 2 week time frame, how fun! I'm thinking of checking out that yellow route down to Naples one day, what do you think?

Now, onto the giveaway! Here are the details on how to enter:

• Log  in to Rafflecopter below and enter the draw by leaving a blog post comment telling me what your favourite driving holiday destination is.
• You can also enter by tweeting about the giveaway.
• The more times you enter, the better your chance of winning the £25 Sainsbury’s voucher!
• Whether or not you’re our prize winner, your favourite driving holiday destination ideas could also potentially appear in a future Money Matters Blog post.
• The winners will be chosen via Rafflecopter (which uses random.org) and announced on this page.
• The deadline for entering the giveaway is Wednesday 5th June.
• Full Terms & Conditions are in the Rafflecopter widget.

As a member of the Family Blogger Network, I can offer this giveaway with Sainsbury's Bank Car Insurance.

Good luck!


a Rafflecopter giveaway
ThePrizeFinder - UK Competitions

nathan - 10 months old

Nathan is now 10 months and this month flew by! We were away in France and Spain for 2 weeks and now I am back at work 2 days a week, so the weeks really have sped along at a rapid pace. 

Nathan's tenth month has been tons of fun. He is now properly pulling himself up to standing and does it with ease. He prefers to be standing above all other positions and can walk along holding onto the edge of the sofa. He hasn't mastered crawling yet but can now get onto his hands and knees. He also somehow manages to maneuver his way around the room by shuffling and wiggling his body. I have to be extra careful not to take my eyes off him for even a second because of how much he gets around. He has fallen down a lot these past weeks as he learns how to balance on his feet, but the falls don't seem to bother him too much.

Nate now raises his hands into the air when we ask him "how big are you!?" and he is starting to point at random things from time to time. He loves to put things inside containers and then dump them out again. He also has started putting objects into people's hands. His middle top tooth on the right has popped through his gum this month and I think the left one is close behind. He has been in some discomfort from the teething but nothing too bad.

I think the most exciting thing (for me) this month is that Nate has started sleeping through the night on the odd occasion. He first slept through the night (from 9pm to 7am) when we were in Spain and my husband and I were shocked; we figured it was just a one time thing. But then he did it again a couple nights later! Since we have been back from our holiday, he has slept through the night at least 5 more times. I have no idea why he started sleeping all night; I did nothing differently and I am still nursing him to sleep. Maybe he was just ready?  In any case, I'm extremely happy that we never had to do any sleep training, despite the pressure to do so from Health Visitors. 

Today Nathan had his first settling in session at nursery. I met his key person and she discussed with me all the details about how nursery will work. I feel much happier about nursery in general now that I have met his key person. She is experienced and friendly and seemed to really bond with Nathan even after just an hour. I take him back on Friday to drop him off with her and the other children for an hour without me there! I'm nervous, but feel confident that he will be in goods hands. 

And now for some obligatory photos of Nathan's tenth month :)

silent sunday

back from France

It's been a couple weeks since I have posted because we have been away in France, but I haven't forgotten about my blog! Things are very busy at the moment so this isn't a long post, but I wanted to quickly say that we had a blast in France. I even managed to convince Mr M to drive us over to Spain for a couple nights to explore San Sebastian. 

Nate did amazingly well on the whole trip and while we were away he started to get on all fours and rock back and forth (I think crawling is imminent!); he also started pulling himself up to standing. And what's even better, he slept through the night 3 times well while away (!). Typically, as soon as we got home he started cutting his top right tooth so his sleep has returned to being all over the place. I will do a proper update on all things Nate when he turns 10 months next week. 

Now that the holiday is over, I am ramping up my work days over the next 3 weeks and then I'm permanently back to 4 days per week starting June 3rd. I'm unbelievably sad that maternity leave is now completely and officially over, but I knew it couldn't last forever, nothing does. I'm just grateful for the time I had with my little man. 

And now I will leave you with few of my favourite photos from our trip.